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The Infinite Transition

Heal your life, step into your power, and live your truth.

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April 2012

A Call To Action: Face Your Fears

“We all find ourselves in situations that at times seem hopeless. And we all have the choice to do nothing or take action.” ~ Catherine Pulsifer

If you’ve reached a point in your life where you know you want more, you know something has to change. In all my years of personal and spiritual growth, I’ve learned that the only thing that needs to change is me. If anyone is going to change, it must be me, not other people. You can’t change other people but you can change yourself. One of the major steps in life is action. If you don’t act, nothing gets done. We can talk about it all we want but until we DO, it won’t change. However, action is actually one of the last steps in the journey (or middle depending on your practice). There are many people who act and still get many of the same results they had in their past. But why? What’s holding them back? Would you believe it if I told you… it’s their FEARS! So I ask you this:

What are you afraid of?

You may think that’s a silly question especially if you’re at an age where you can say “I’ve been around long enough for___. I’ve seen it all.” The truth is that we’re all afraid of something and that fear plays a large role in our lives regardless of age. It’s stopped you from seizing many opportunities in life from jobs to relationships and so on. This must be dealt with otherwise, you’ll keep recreating the same problems in life, just in different forms. Those forms may be the same scenario but with different people, places and things. Keep in mind, that fear is a belief. So you’re actually changing your beliefs to alter your actions.

Facing your fears

The only way to conquer your fears and change your beliefs is to face the fear head on. It’s that simple but not always easy. So I’ve compiled a few tools to help you in that quest:

1) Write down your fears

If you want to conquer your fears, you must write them down. Get them out of your body/mind/spirit and put them in black and white. You can’t change a belief without identifying it and this is the best way to do such. If you want to use your computer you’re welcome to do that too. Whatever works, just get it out of your system. You need to be able to physically look at it either daily or occasionally.

2) Embrace the fear

Yeah, you read that correctly. Embrace it. Accept it. It’s a part of you as of the time you wrote it out. Take it in and notice how it feels. Take some deep breaths with it, absorb it and merge with it. Then, accept it as a part of you… now you know what you want to get rid of. This is one of the most overlooked steps in personal/spiritual growth. There are people who would try to tell you to ignore your fears. While it’s good intentioned, it’s also unrealistic. You can’t conquer your fears by ignoring them. You must face them standing up otherwise, you won’t change the belief. Remember, this is who you are as of now. You don’t have to continue being that person, unless of course, you choose to.

3) ACTION!

With all of the inner work mentioned, this is really the last step. Believe it or not, most people think you can just act without some ground work laid. This is a mistake. Any spiritual teacher/master will tell you that you must be in the state of “being” first. Be then Do. What I gave you first were the “being” steps.

What I will caution you on is staying there. There are some spiritual practices that tell you that you can just pray your way out of any situation and that God/Source/Creator/Universe will take care of everything. While I’m all for prayer and meditation coming from a spiritual background myself and I encourage daily practice of that, you can’t sit there forever and “just” pray/meditate. As some point, you must act. The Universe will always put opportunities in front of you because you asked for them. It’s up to you to be aware enough to identify them and act on them.

Proof of Concept

I was recently introduced to this term a few weeks ago. I mentioned that the only way to conquer your fears is to challenge them. A proof of concept is a way to do just that. It’s used to build confidence in something that you’re not sure about. For example: My business partners are involved in real estate as a side project and they weren’t sure if they were going to make money on it. They were advised to purchase a small, inexpensive property that if they made money on, great. If not, they didn’t lose much. After they made money the first few months, they gained confidence to continue to repeat the process. In otherwords, they started small and gained the confidence to move forward to do more. If you want more out of your life, you’re going to have to apply this method in everything you do. I like to tell my saxophone students in my lessons to give themselves the opportunity to learn. It’s the only way to move forward in life. Sometimes jumping all in isn’t the best decision. You do need to test the waters and lay the ground work but as I mentioned earlier, at some point you must act. Find out if things work or not, then see if you need to change directions or alter some decisions.

I was inspired to write this because I’m currently going through this in my life. I wanted to get more out of life but there were certain fears hindering me from taking action. Until I identified them, I wasn’t able to figure out what steps to take next. I hope this post resonated with you.

What was the thing event or situation that inspired your call to action? What fears did you have to face along the way? I’d love to hear your feedback.

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Defining Success, Part 3: Passions

pas·sion   [pash-uhn]

noun

1. any powerful or compelling emotion or feeling, as love or hate.
2. strong amorous feeling or desire; love; ardor.

3. a strong or extravagant fondness, enthusiasm, or desire for anything: a passion for music.
4. the object of such a fondness or desire: Accuracy became a passion with him.

5. an outburst of strong emotion or feeling: He suddenly broke into a passion of bitter words.
“A person can succeed at almost anything for which they have unlimited enthusiasm.” ~ Charles Schwab
Unlimited enthusiasm! That stands out strongly for me. I look at some of the most successful people in their respective professions and they have an endless love for what they do. There are so many people I know who wouldn’t trade what they do now for someone else. Whether they are musicians, small business owners or young business professionals, their love for their work keeps them going daily.
Passions are the things that we could do even if we lost everything. For me, you couldn’t take away my passion for music and culture as those are extremely important to me, even when I’m deep in a financial hole. I put that out there because while money is important to being able to live it’s not the definitive to what you like and love (unless you’re that guy/gal who loves money and yes, they do exist and they’re not always rich). Here’s an exercise to try for you:
Write down 3-5 things your passionate about.
This is a cool exercise that spawned off of a class I took. The passions don’t have to be what you will be in 20 years or so, although they can be, but what you would like to be doing now. So try this exercise with the following guidelines:
1) Write your passion in action words (doing, being, feeling). I am loving my significant other with all my heart.
2) What would you be doing if money wasn’t an option. Remember: Money may be an essential but it’s not the definitive. You get to decide that.
3) If you’re thoughts go negative, (ie. Getting away from ___) turn them around to the opposite (Being in a place of ____). Keep this a positive exercise. What you put out you bring about.
I would also recommend seeking out a course or exercise that helps bring out your passions. For me, that tool was a class literally called, The Passion Test. I was first exposed to it by one of my friends in the area who is a passion test facilitator and is also her business. She enjoys helping people discover their passions and live them without making money the prime focus (or fear would be the better substitute). That class helped me gain more focus in my life as I was able to see it in black and white. Once you put it where you can see it, it just means more, especially if you’re a person who has problems expressing themselves like me.
I believe that there’s nothing greater in life than to do what you love, even when money is involved. For me, it’s making that transition to doing what I don’t want to do into fitting everything in. In the end, we’re never given more than we can handle but that’s a conversation for another time.
What is something that you absolutely LOVE to do without thinking hard about? Has it kept you going even when you were down? Please discuss and leave me your comments!

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